/sɪti bəʊl mɑːkɪt/ Come one, come all!

Come one

Come all!

Are you looking for a rad place to hang out and chillax? You like to have an ice-cold fresh draft beer from a micro brewery surrounded by people who are on fleek? You’ve become bored of all the lame asses in the shopping malls, where you get mainstream bullshit? Then you should come to the City Bowl market.

In the heat of Cape Town’s summer I shuffled through the streets, watching all these posers and basic bitches. Out of the blue I discovered this tiny market in Hope Street. In this historical building you’ll find an Art Gallery which sells comics, locally made sunglasses, vinyls, books and much more. And there are of course all these passionate food traders who are selling high-quality foods based on the freshest of ingredients.

First one has to pick up a fancy glass of chamomile lemon gin (which is my new fav drink).  After that  grab a „Simple Wrap“. Don’t be confused by the name. It’s a unique and surprisingly delicious sushi burrito, which sparked a firework of flavours in my mouth. The time of lame unhealthy gluten-laden burrito is over. Until now you could only get this finger-licking wraps on markets. But soon they will open a shop in the city of Cape Town. So go for it, before it becomes too commercial.

There is a lot more food to discover such as fancy brownies, Durban Curry, empanadas or goats cheese and… every thing is sustainable, fo shizzle. So there is absolute no reason to cook on a Thursday night if you can have delicious home made food in a fabulous upbeat atmosphere where an obscure live band is performing. So come and check it out! (Before all the posers ruin it!)

Marika Wildhaber

/lækə fuːd/ The 10 Lekkerest Capetonian Meals & Drinks 100% vegetarian – 100% lekker – 100% rad

 

If you ever find yourself in Cape Townyou should totes  try all of the amazeballs dishes and drinks.

I tried my best to collect the fanciest treats you could ever think of.

10. Rocket Till You Rock It!

The bicycle tour is starting soon and you need some extra nutrition before you start?

Order the aubergine-tomato-gratin with crunchy bread as well as a crisp rocket salad at Loaves on Long.

You will love the complex flavours of fresh vegetables, creamy cheese and warm bread…And then your ride can start and even last a bit longer…

P.S.: Of course at Loaves on Long you will get the best and crunchiest bread in whole Cape Town. (name drop much?)

9. Chakalaka – The Whole Performance of Elegance & Complexity

If you’re not sure what to do on a sunny Sunday afternoon then it’s definitely time to do a fascinating wine tasting at Spice Route.

Their most exotic wine (even its name is so awesome) is the “Chakalaka 2014”. This alcoholic highlight combines cloves with savoury notes that give way to plum and black cherry on the nose!

Cheers!

8. Cauliflower – Mushroom – harmony in a flowery – sylvan surrounding

The perfect place to reread one of the Bronte’s classics is fo shizzle Groot Constantia.

On the oldest wine estate in Cape Town’s it’s bloody hip to spend time reading, enjoying the sun and having a light cauliflower – mushroom – salad while doing so.

FOMO? you totes have to give it a try.

7. Choco – Shock – LOL!

If you are a real chocoholic (join the club) “De Villiers – Artisan Chocolate” is the place to be.

The most mouth-watering ensnarement is totes the “Raspberry Vanilla & Almond” Chocolate on the Spice Route. And if you cannot get enough, there are more than 10 other fancy chocolate types that want to be devoured…

6. The Most Exquisite Burger of Your Life!

Chickpeas intertwined with caramelized onions and slices of avocado topped with a spicy whiskey sauce perform as the perfect taste orgasm for an amazing start to your Friday evening…

So let’s go to the Hout Bay Nightmarket, try the 100% vegan and organic flavour explosion and say good bye to Royale Eatery and Co (way too mainstream obviously).

5. La Petite Moo – Mon Amour!

Fair is fair! And Honey is Honey! Or not? At La Petite Moo Brownies whole honeycombs conglomeratse with the creamy fluid dark chocolate batter and thereby becomes a unique unit of tastiness. Visit the Earth Fair Market on Thursday afternoons in St. Georges Mall to provide yourself with the most “chocolaty” self-indulgence of the whole Cape.

P.S.: If you prefer other versions you can also choose the red velvet cheesecake brownie… a totes pleasure!!

4. Full Fluid Fruity-Chocolate Flavour for Good Cause

After a long afternoon in the vintage Vinylshop there’s nothing better to do than having a “Red Berry Chocolate Brownie Milkshake” at Brownies&Downies at the beginning of Long Street.

The full flavour of frozen chocolate combined with a light fruit aroma is topped by a huge whipped cream topping… Mhm… and the best thing about this is not even the amazeballs flavour and its organic character but moreover the fact that you support mentally challenged and physical disabled people that run the shop and welcome you in a bloody warm-hearted and friendly way.

Tip.: Even for us Povos its possible to go there because the huge milkshake portion just costs 38R and is so filing that you can leave out supper fo shizzle!!

3. Not Only “Something Simple” But Also “Something Special” – The Edo Wrap

100% organic, 100% gluten free, 100% super-yummy!!

The simple Sushi wrap can be filled with the most qualitative delectations up to your choice and is the raddest way to have lunch. You can get the speciality at seven different markets in and around Cape Town right now. I personally recommend the vegan “Black-Mushroom” version atly the Earth Fair Market. Exceptional – extreme yummy – far more than boring Sushi – Edo!

2. For Hot Summer Days: The Brand-New Release of CBC’s Peach Beer

Hand crafted beer is one of the most important things in life and now it has made its way into a new era. Since last week the Peach flavoured hand crafted CBC beer is available on the South African market and it’s the most suitable solution to get off your tits on a hot summer weekend while dancing to the awesome beats of your favourite band XXXX.

1. Short & Curly’s – Self-made & Caring-Prepared Ice Cream

When you think you’ve already tried the fanciest ice cream flavours such as basil, chai tea and Brazilian pawpaw, then you might be wrong. Short & Curly’s ice cream is the latest craze. The chocolate or vanilla base cream gets frozen and mashed before your eyes while you choose your three personal toppings.

With a lot of effort the “icerista” creates the most delicious and coldest eatable artwork you’ve ever seen. You totes have to give it a try!! An awesome possibility for that is the Neighbourgoods-Market at the Old Biscuit Mill in our bloody loved home area: Woodstock!

I hope you are now totes keen to try some of the lekkerest delectations the Cape has to offer!!

Try it and you’ll like it! Fo shizzle!

Verena Schaetzle

/mɑːkɪt/ Hipster meetings at the market

To meet friends one has to find a fashionably vintage place, to ensure a good vibe. Obviously.

This place is nice when it has a variety of food and drink stalls. It is even better when a live band plays indie rock or post-punk revival genres.

 

One of the main problems is to find a seat – I don’t know why this kind of place is always full (probably because of all the posers) and to choose what you want to eat and drink comes as the second problem.. There are various cuisines to choose from – such as Indian cooked by a lovely lady who combines Indian flavours and Turkish ingredients (mixed with her close love of Vegetarianism) – and craft beer shops.

 

When you have finally made your choice (an hour or so  later) you have to share your feelings and treasures with your friends. After each mouthful a new flavour sensation is piqued – you can feel your palate becoming mature.

And cool guys like to learn new things everyday – especially when it is about organic foods and drinks.

Laurent Fabre

/tətuː/ Tattoo

You’ve always wanted to get a tattoo but you’re too afraid of what your mum would say ? Just remember one thing : YOLO ! What’s the point of living if you can’t express yourself ? And what could be a better canvas than your own body for that ? So sorry Mummy, but just have a look at these rad tattoos and you’ll totes understand our devotion to this art.

 

1. The moustache

Real moustaches are so 2016. Tattoos moustaches are cool A.F !

2. The feather

You are a tough girl, we know that. But as every human being, you’re also delicate. Don’t be ashamed of it. No in fact, you should express it ! The feather is the perfect symbol for that.

3. The triangle

One of my faves. Firstly, because it’s a small symbol so it doesn’t cost a lot of money. And come on, we’re all povos. Then, it can mean so many different things : stability, trinity, it’s even the symbol of women… So get one but don’t tell anybody why. Stay mysterious. Obscure even. But please, pick  a good tattoo artist because it’s a complex drawing.

4. The “deep, deep” phrases or lyrics

Hipsters are tormented, we all know that. And sometimes our fav artist expresses  exactly what we are feeling (Hipsters connexion). So don’t go further, just pick one phrase you like. There is no copyright for tattoos.

5. The other geometric symbols

To finish, the perfect symbol of your complexity. These are awks and amazeballs at the same time. But guys, just make sure you’re not epileptic before getting this kind of tattoos.

So now, you don’t have any excuses. Go to “Sins of style” on Buitenkant Street and ask for the tattoo you’ve chosen. Trust me, you’ll be on fleek for schizzle !

Laurie Weber

/sævi/ My Hipster savvy

I was tired of the best-seller writers,and strolling along the streets of Cape Town when my second hand leather Camdem Town shoes took me to HeavenS – the trendiest coffee bar in Woodstock.I needed a cup of coffee (maybe two or more) to chill.I could no longer stand those writers who were making a killing like Kent Follet, who took 700 pages to built a cathedral,forcing readers to spend R700 on coffee to finish the book.

After two cups of coffee in HeavenS I ” looked at the bright side”of my coffee table and I saw a pile of classic books on it.I grabbed Shakespeare’s Othello and after a few pages I “ran” into a piercing shop and got an ear-piercing ,there after I bought a cheap flight ticket from a low cost company for a holiday in Venice. Just before getting caught up in this ‘Shakespeare in love’ daydream I ordered another cortado.

Back in HeavenS,I browsed through a William Blake book and after 2 more double cortados my pupils were so wide that I could see Blake’s world in black and white. I submerged myself into  Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness. I was on the verge of sinking into  litres of black coffee – reminiscent of the Congo river, but thought it well to test my blood pressure   … which had risen up and produced tachycardia….So I ordered a cappuccino and anxiously wished for the next  Harry Potter tome  to came out.

Juan de Pablo Tremps

/mæn bʌn/ Man bun

A man bun is a type of long hairstyle that involves the tying of one’s hair into a single bun to be placed upon the crown area of the head.

You can choose whether you want a full bun or a semi-bun – this is determined by the length of hair you use to knot the bun.

This trend started in 2013, but men have been using the bun hairstyle for centuries. This was common in the Roman Empire, but now the man bun is seen as a trend which was started by hipster. A common hipster look is the wearing of the man bun with a beard, but it’s associated with other urban tribes like heavy metal dudes and hippies. The man bun has become more and more popular and has even become a common sight in hipster-friendly cities like New York, London and Stockholm. Furthermore there’s an African community that use the man bun style (Rastafarians).

So, the man bun is a trend of real hipsters who want to differentiate themselves.

If you are a hipster, what are you waiting for?

Andrea Vivoda

/bʊkstɔː/ Hipster bookstores

Have you ever seen a hipster bookstore? They look like  old buildings made of wood and brick, a lot of furniture and old stuff. This is typical of bookstores hipsters love.

Here we find books with elements of pastiche, sarcasm, satire, existential crises, bizarre things and also other genres like history, autobiography etc.,  books that you most likely have never heard of and never will, unless of course you are a hipster.

Hipsters like books like Love is a Mixtape by Rob Sheffield, Friendship: A novel by Emily Gould, Super Sad True Love Story by Gary Shteyngart or some book written by David Foster Wallace.

If you want to become a hipster you have to read these kind of books, but i doubt that you will finish one of them.

Luiz Felipe Vieira de Souza

/ɑːkeɪd faɪə/ Why Arcade Fire is the best band in the world and why they don’t need to be mainstream

Back to 2001: pop is in, indie rock is almost dead. Radiohead hasn’t produced a good album since 1997. The Strokes seem to be thinking about a next album. The Pixies are over, and Arcade Fire was born.

The first time I listened to Arcade Fire’s Rebellion (Lies) I was Blown away. By the time the hammering piano and distorted guitar (whirring like an air raid siren) begin, you’re bristling with anticipation. Then I hear the lyrics: a blend of anger, lament, romance, paranoia and euphoria –  better than a mug of Resurrection Blend from Truth Coffee.They don’t have to work at getting anybody’s attention.

Such are the spoils of being one of the most successful bands on the planet, which Arcade Fire has been since at least February 2011, when their 3rd album, The Suburbs, won a Grammy for Album of the Year, beating  favourites such as Eminem, Lady Gaga and Katy Perry.

After four albums they are not only still relevant, but they remain the modern act which other bands should aspire to be.

Mirella Gutierrez

/ɒnwiː kɔːtɑːdəʊ/ Ennui Cortado

ennui (‘ɒnwiː) n. a feeling of listlessness and general dissatisfaction resulting from lack of activity or excitement. [C18: < F: apathy, < OF enui annoyance, vexation]

cortado (kɔː’tɑːdəʊ) n. a drink of espresso coffee with a small amount of steamed milk. [<Sp. café cortado, ‘cut coffee’, from cortar ‘to cut]

Harper Collins, 1993. Collins Shorter English Dictionary. 1st ed. Glasgow: Harper Collins Publishers.

/deɪ fɔː / Browsing books and slipping class

The topics of the day included the emotional connection millennials seem to have with coffee and also their complete disregard for proper retirement planning. Oh, dear. In true millennial fashion we decided to go to our local artisan food market rather than worrying about our future.

On our way to the market we happened upon a book stall. Unfortunately for the stall holder none of us bought any books – being POVO means one has to choose between the quinoa salad and a slightly mouldy Lawrence or Molliere. The quinoa won.

Our dearest Trynity was feeling a bit under the weather, which means that Mike had to pose with a pineapple (this is not a Hamlet rip-off, Shakespeare is so overrated), showcasing his Bree Street hipster style.